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  • Laniese Wallace

Failed Attempt x2 (Inspire by anonymous Snacker!)

Have you ever been so disappointed in someone’s performance that it had you stressed out? Had you thinking, why the fuck did I do that? That selfish one-nut mind really gets us sometimes. Leaves us feeling bamboozled even, lets dive in shall we…


It was a Monday night, and the vibe was perfect. My child was sleep, so I decided I deserved a couple of drinks. I was feeling good, and I was in the mood. I needed some rough, pull my hair type of sex to relieve the stress of my long day. We have all been there. So I called one of my options. A fine ass, super chill, 6’4 option of mine and just knew he was going to give what he was supposed to. I was so wrong! I had experienced sex with this man before and it was “alright”. I thought tonight is the night, he will come over and do me right this time. He knew he had dropped the ball, the last encounter. I will let you know.


He lets me know he is on his way, and I was ready to devour this man. After the day I had and how I was feeling, this moment in time was everything. The first time him and I had sex I was also sober, this time he was going to experience me in a new light. The drunk me, AKA the freaky me. Moving right along, he tells me he is outside, I let him in, and he immediately starts removing his clothes. I don’t know about y’all, but I was not convinced. RED FLAG, he was not worried about shared pleasure. “We do not condone the fuckery around here!”.


“I had a fresh waxed pussy”, I was thinking he is about to ruin this moment for me. Willing and ready is one thing, but he was a little too eager for my taste. We get to the bed, yes unfortunately we got that far, all hope was not lost yet. I wanted to give him a chance, I had a motive too. He was kissing me, and he was touching all of the right places, but the vibe was off. A vibe that perfect with me, myself, and I, when he entered the room my damn playlist wasn’t even aligned anymore. I saw tragedy coming, but I was so fixated on my nut and my goals for the night, I LET HIM INSERT. Lord, why did I do that!


He fucked me like a teenage boy that had never had sex before, he pulled my hair so gently I wanted to kick him out mid-stroke. “The fact that I was thinking about the next bill, and my next meal”, it was terrible. They say a woman’s intuition is always right, and it sure was this night! When I say if the dick is not giving you will get put out of my house, I mean that.


I asked if he was done yet, when he finished I politely grabbed his clothes and put them at the front door. I think he was at my house for a total of 30minutes. Shared pleasure is extremely important. I told him, “You came over here worried about your nut and your nut only, do not call me, EVER!”. My pussy blessed this man’s soul, yet I went to bed dissatisfied in every aspect. “Moral of the story folks, do not settle in life or in the bedroom. Fuck yourself and enjoy that, LITERALLY!” Self sex, is great sex!

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