Snackers, here we are with another one! This week we are going to dive into speaking the fuck up and expressing how you feel. Life is too short, and we are too grown to be playing games. If you feel a way, say it. Please stop acting like you do not care for someone in 2023, it is not cute. Let’s get into it…
Feelings, feelings, and more feelings. They come and go, but when they grow why do people out here pretend that is not the case? Now, this entry this week is for my men and women that may have gone through or are going through a similar situation. However, I am speaking from my experience of course…and let me tell you, these men out here are about to work my last nerve. The “macho man” role is very much so played out, FYI.
If you fuck with someone and feel that shit, then let it be that. Stop trying to run away from what is or what could be because you do not want to face vulnerability. In my opinion, deflecting is only exhausting. Telling someone you care about them or even love them, just to act like you do not is garbage. I am keeping it real this week! We do not talk about playing with people’s emotions often enough. If you cannot and are not able to take on the responsibility of someone’s heart, stop fucking with it like it is a toy.
We are human, and attachment happens, then men act like they have amnesia when more is required of them to move forward in any given situation. Will forget about all the flips, twists, and some more shit they did to keep you around. Phrases like “it is just casual” or “it was never that deep” will show you very quickly where you stand with someone number one, number two, if that is the energy abort mission! No one has the time to be on some high school version of the bachelorette. Remember the right one won't have amnesia!
I am personally not in the market for anything that is not intentional. Snackers, you know that is my motto. I hope we are all working on adopting that mindset. If it is not serving you, men and women, baby let it go. What benefit is someone bringing to your life if they are playing with you and your emotions knowing you go hard for them, absolutely none. If they are not ready, that is okay too. Sometimes we have gotten to a point in a situation where someone is simply not ready to admit they are feeling you because they have other areas of blockage that have zero to do with you most times.
We can get into the technicalities of who is messed up more, or why they are not sold because of a, b, c, and d…the list goes on right. My point is, you typically learn those things after the feelings have already developed, it is a choice to stay or not based on what you find out. If you decided to stay after 6 months, you know what the fuck you are doing and why. Come on now!
Pride and ego will really fuck you up in a romantic relationship. People would rather lose a good person or thing than admit they have feelings or were wrong, accountability is everything. No one wants to say I was wrong or say I did not want to show vulnerability because…, or I cannot commit because…etc. They usually just don’t do it. It is not until conversations are had that reveal someone’s true intention with you. That is the part that “makes my ass itch!” (As my grandma always says).
I recently had a couple of situations that had me really looking at mutha fuckas sideways. I was all in love, meeting parents, exchanging gifts, going on trips (out of the country), sentimental jewelry and shit, all the things that seem to reflect progress. A level of seriousness, right? Just to turn around one day and say “This does not mean anything”. I was shocked, hurt, was unsure how to move in the given situation. But the moment acting accordingly takes place, a man is the victim.
If you cannot take the heat because you want to stand on the I do not care energy. Then get the fuck out of the kitchen, because I am the type of woman that will turn up the heat to 400 degrees and ask those tough questions. I have standards and know what I want. I have worked hard to enforce boundaries. We all know dick and good looks make it even harder to stand on those boundaries. So please, I repeat, please stop playing with folks you have no intentions with. Do not come and go as you please and stop trying to put the friendship band-aid on shit that was not a friendship initially. I was feeling you and you were feeling me, fucking simple. You never know what healing looks like for that person or how the games you play will affect them in the long run.
In my experience, a man would rather not admit versus try to effectively communicate their feelings. Good man or not, the only difference is the actual willingness to do so. Hit the inbox at indulge@snackonthis.com and help me understand why that is. Say what it is and do right or let that person go! It is not cute, and it is not fair to the other party involved to prolong that shit if you are not in a space to admit it. Period. Now go admit you fuck with them and move on! Do the work.
Thank you for reading. I love you all!