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  • Writer's pictureLaniese Wallace

Oh Shit, My Wig! (Recently Deleted)

Snackers, I know you all have had some mishaps during sex before! But when the wig loosens up, “Houston we have a problem”. Mini afro exposed and gripping the combs on the side tight, I thought my shit was for sure falling off that night. Lord have mercy, my hair almost hit the floor! Had the carpet and my 18inches made contact, my soul. Now you are wondering, how did I get into this mess? Well, it is simple. The longer, the heavier and I was not secure! That is what I get for rushing. Being fast and trying to go get some dick really quick. Take your time ladies, and gents!

See what had happened was…I was a little buzzed trying to put my wig on to go to the casino. Last minute plans came through. I check my hair in the mirror and was like hmmm this is not a good look. So I pull out one of my trusty wigs. Now at the time I was wearing wigs after I did the “big chop”, so my hair was only long enough to make the wig stop, you feel me. Corn rows not able to make the cut yet type of length honey! Most definitely not equipped for physical activity. Imagine that trying to hold 18inches. A set up for disaster is exactly what it was. I do not recall if I threw on a wig cap underneath or not. Matter of fact, that might have been what got me in trouble.

After the casino we head back to the room, one thing led to another. You know how it goes. Next thing I know, I feel my hairline slip back to the middle of my head and I am like oh no! I had to move fast, use my reflexes quick! I had one hand on top of my head and the other on him. Moaning even harder acting like I am really into it now. At this point I am super loud. I needed a distraction! That was the only way I was going to make it out of this and disguise the fact that my wig just slipped. The inches down my back got caught underneath me and he was on top. So there was simply no way to maneuver properly. I was stuck. I know one thing, my ass made sure I was never in a similar predicament. I could not handle losing my wig during sex ever again. I learned my lesson!

If I have any advice after this stressful ass night. Please secure the wig and make sure it is going nowhere. Because there is nothing worse than trying to be sexy and losing your damn hair. I had to make sure my mishap did not show the life I was living that night. Good thing we had been drinking, maybe his vision was blurry. All I know is I acted quick, fast and in a hurry! He was acting like nothing happened. Which was definitely fine by me. I laughed the whole night. He never asked why. He probably knew why. Just know y’all if my entire wig fell off that night I would have been mortified.

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